


Double Standards

by fenfyre (Jace)



Series: The Poetry Of Ideas [6]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Blow Jobs, Exhibitionism, Healthy Polyamory, Jealousy, M/M, Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations, Threesome, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-30
Updated: 2019-02-27
Packaged: 2019-10-19 13:33:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17602301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jace/pseuds/fenfyre
Summary: “Listen, I never meant to replace you, I swear that isn’t what this is, I just…”“Hey, hey. I know”, Matt interrupts him, hands reaching towards Shiro for a moment before his eyes flick over to the other paladins and he pulls back, shifting awkwardly on the couch. “I’m glad you found someone who can be there for you, I am. But I … I just keep thinking hey, that could’ve been…”~Their reunion, as happy an occasion as it is, starts out bittersweet. But Matt soon learns that Could-Have-Beens don't have to be everything still left between them.





	1. Chapter 1

“I see you changed your policy”, comes Matt’s voice after a stretch of silence between them, soft and relaxed, making Shiro’s gaze shift away from the other paladins and over to the young man sitting on the couch next to him.  
They’d finished their training a while ago and settled for some leisure time in the lounge before dinner, Hunk and Pidge having brought some device or another that they tinkered with while Lance watched, delivering snarky commentary and making jokes. They’re far away and distracted enough as to not have heard the quiet words.  
  
Shiro frowns.  
“Policy? I don’t…”  
Matt arches an elegant eyebrow – pretty, he’s grown so pretty and mature – and slowly moves his eyes over to Lance who’s leaning against Hunk’s shoulder, snickering about a horrible pun he made.  
“Don’t tell me you thought I wouldn’t notice.” He sounds a little disappointed but mostly amused as he scoots closer to Shiro so he can lower his voice even more. “You look at him like a lost puppy sometimes.”  
  
Shiro almost chokes on his own spit, feeling his cheeks heat up as clears his throat to hide the warm pang of embarrassment.  
It’s true, he knows it is. Lance is so beautiful and radiant and fun that sometimes Shiro can’t help but feel drawn in by him, no matter where they are or who is around to see.  
He never meant for Matt to find out but there is no hiding this, not really.  
“So what happened to no dating your subordinates?”  
“Well, I…” No, this isn’t right. Shiro takes a slow, calming breath, reminding himself that he’s done nothing wrong, he doesn’t need to get defensive about any of this. Even though his instincts are trying to convince him he should grovel.  
  
“First of all, he’s not my subordinate. We’re a team. And second, what makes you think we’re…” A pointed look from Matt shuts him up and makes him crumble. The man knows him all too well. “Yeah, we’re kind of dating.”  
Matt nods once, satisfied with the answer but not having had enough just yet.  
“So what changed?”, he asks and there’s not a single spark of accusation in his voice, only curiosity and wonder.  
Shiro sighs. He doesn’t have a chance.  
  
“There’s no Garrison guidelines here”, he begins slowly, careful to keep his voice low and an eye out for unwanted attention from the others. “And … all that we’ve been through made me realize a few things.”  
“Like…?”  
“Like … I can’t keep anyone safe by pushing them away. We’re fighting a war and terrible things just happen sometimes. But if there’s a chance for some happiness, well, we shouldn’t let it go. Right?”  
  
Matt gives a low, thoughtful hum and when he speaks again there’s something wispy to his voice. Something delicate and vulnerable.  
“Does he make you happy?”  
Shiro feels his chest tighten, a coldness squeezing around his heart that he can’t shake. He knows the answer but he doesn’t say it out loud, eyes on Lance as the boy tousles Pidge’s hair who smacks his hand away with a stifled laugh.  
  
“He’s a lot like you, you know?”, Shiro says instead and just barely hears the soft breath that escapes Matt before he puts on a grin to hide the trace of pain that flashed across his expression.  
“What? Young, nerdy and handsome?”, he jokes and Shiro comes this close to burying his face in his hands to escape the embarrassment. Instead he sighs deeply, quietly, and turns his full attention back to Matt.  
“Listen, I never meant to replace you, I swear that isn’t what this is, I just…”  
“Hey, hey. I know”, Matt interrupts him, hands reaching towards Shiro for a moment before his eyes flick over to the other paladins and he pulls back, shifting awkwardly on the couch. “I’m glad you found someone who can be there for you, I am. But I … I just keep thinking hey, that could’ve been…”  
  
Just in that moment Pidge cries out triumphantly, fists pumping up into the air.  
“Matt!”, she shouts with a carefree laugh. The device they’d been tinkering with floats in the air between the three of them, blue and green lights blinking across it’s smooth surface. “Look, look we configured it!”  
“Amazing!”, Matt shouts back as he jumps to his feet, honest excitement spreading across his face. “Let me see, what did you make it do?”  
Before he can stride across the room though Shiro wraps careful fingers around his wrist, holding him back for just a moment longer as he ducks behind Matt’s body so the others can’t see him talk.  
“Please come to my room after dinner? We can talk some more, figure this out…”  
  
For a moment Shiro thinks Matt will pull away, decline the offer. But then he sees a tiny, hesitant nod and the next second Matt is across the room to twirl his sister around, much to Lance’s and Hunk’s amusement.  
That has to be enough for now.

~

“You sure he’s coming?”, Lance asks from where he’s lounging on the bed, his utterly relaxed body language making Shiro feel even worse about his own nervousness. It doesn’t help that it’s been a while since they all went their separate ways after dinner and they’re still waiting for Matt to show up.  
“I don’t know, I … I thought he would…”  
“Well”, Lance drawls and stretches languidly. “I got a few ideas what we could do instead…” Shiro knows exactly what kind of ideas Lance has, and yes, it’s tempting when he looks like that, thighs falling apart invitingly and shirt sliding up to reveal tan skin. So pretty and warm.  
But this isn’t the time and after Shiro gives a short shake of his head Lance pulls himself together with a soft sigh, scooting up the bed as he tries to look less seductive.  
  
It can’t be long after that before there’s a knock against the door and Shiro leaves his perch on the desk to open it, fingers trembling just slightly.  
“Hey”, he breathes, not quite trusting his voice as he looks down at Matt who seems calm but strangely guarded. “Thanks for coming by.”  
“I…” Before Matt can finish the sentence his eyes wander somewhere behind Shiro and he tilts his head when he spots Lance on the bed, the slightest crease appearing between his eyebrows. The expression is confusion instead of anger.  
  
“Heya”, Lance chirps and Shiro steps aside with a shuddery breath, making room for Matt to come in. For a second or two all three of them are still and the irrational fear Matt might just turn around and leave rears it’s ugly head in the back of Shiro’s mind.  
Then Matt takes a step forward into the room, still confused but apparently curious enough to see where this is going. A second later the door glides closed behind him and an awkward silence falls. Until Lance pushes himself upright.  
  
“So I heard you’re into my man”, he grins and Shiro doesn’t know if he wants to hide his face with a groan or chuck something at his insufferable boyfriend. Matt’s face flushes an endearing shade of pink.  
“Hey, it’s okay”, Lance continues with a casual shrug as he climbs to his feet and heads over to them, easily wrapping his arms around both their waists and pulling them to the bed. “Come in, let’s sit.”  
Somehow he manages to shove them both down on the edge of the mattress before he climbs onto the bed as well, arranging them so Matt is squished between them as he throws an arm around their guest’s shoulders.  
  
“Matt, my guy, first of all I gotta say you have _amazing_ taste. Shiro’s just…” He lets out a sweet sigh that only seems a tiny bit exaggerated. “Isn’t he?”  
The blush on Matt’s face darkens and Shiro tries to scoot aside to give him more space but then a smirk pulls on Matt’s lips and he gives a nod, slow and careful, and when he speaks his words sound amused and fascinated.  
“Yeah, he really is something…”  
  
Their eyes meet for just a second before Matt’s flick away again, the short but honest connection enough to make Shiro’s heart stutter excitedly. They are really about to do this.  
As if on cue Lance grins widely, his thumb absentmindedly rubbing Matt’s shoulder in a soothing back and forth motion. Surprisingly it seems like Matt leans into him, into the touch.  
“See?” Lance’s voice is so smooth he almost purrs. “I think he means a lot to you and I _know_ you mean a lot to him so … I wouldn’t exactly mind sharing. If we can agree on some rules first.”  
“Sh-sharing?”, Matt wheezes and his shoulders pull tight.  
With a sigh Shiro decides to intervene and he carefully places a hand on top of Lance’s, the one that’s still rubbing Matt’s shoulder.  
  
“Lance, let’s back up a bit, okay?”, he hums. “Take it slow.”  
He knows Lance means well, that he wants to show Matt how him and his feeling are accepted here, that he wants to make him feel welcome and at ease.  
But at this rate they’ll end up scaring Matt away, especially dumping an invitation like that into his lap without any explanation whatsoever.  
Thankfully Lance pulls back immediately, handing the reigns over to Shiro as he scoots aside. For a moment it seems like Matt strains after him and his exuberant touches with a subtle and instinctive movement, then he settles back down and runs a hand through his hair, eyes flicking from Shiro to Lance and back again.  
  
“Okay”, he breathes, still sounding a little overwhelmed. Lance tends to do that to people sometimes. “Okay, what … is this?”  
At least he still hasn’t gotten up and run away yet. Shiro takes a moment to appreciate that small victory before he takes a breath and begins to explain.

“See, Lance and me, we have this agreement. We love each other and we’re in a relationship but we’re not exactly … exclusive.” Matt lets out a surprised hum at that but doesn’t say anything, waiting patiently for Shiro to continue. Which he does.  
“We talked it through pretty early and made this decision together when it became apparent that … well…” An embarrassed little chuckle escapes Shiro, his eyes flicking between the two young men on his bed, Matt sitting straight and a little tense but listening curiously, Lance leaning back and watching their conversation.  
“Lance is a very energetic, curious and … engaging person and with everything going on I can’t meet his needs or give him the attention he deserves all the time.”  
  
“Yeah sure”, Lance drawls, easily catching Matt’s attention. “More like he can’t chain this”, he gestures up and down his body with an obnoxious grin, “down, gotta leave something for the rest of the universe, you know?”  
Matt snorts and rolls his eyes but the expression on his face is soft and fond. Shiro knows that feeling, knows it all too well.  
“So we agreed that, if he ever meets someone he’s interested in, he’s free to pursue them within the rules that we set. Like that I want him to tell me about them and what happened between them.”  
  
“Same goes for him too, by the way”, Lance added, sounding more serious this time as he points at Shiro with a flick of his wrist. “If he ever wants to fuck someone he can, as long as he comes back to me and tells me about his dirty little adventure.”  
Matt hums again, a quiet, thoughtful noise as he regards Shiro, blinking slowly, then turning back to Lance.  
“I never thought he was the type for that…”  
“Yeah, see … that’s the thing”, Lance answers with a solemn nod. “He has all these groupies trying to get some, all the cute aliens we saved who clearly have a thing for him … but he never did anything. Never picked up even one of them. I was starting to feel bad, you know, enjoying my freedom while he, well, doesn’t…”  
  
“So…”, Matt hums, licking his lips. There’s something ticking away in that beautiful mind of his. “He didn’t make use of your agreement but you did?” It’s not an accusation, Shiro hears it in the mellow tone, sees it in the curious spark behind bright eyes, but Lance doesn’t know Matt like that and bristles, crossing his arms.  
“Matt, my guy”, he begins, firm and confident. “Am I a slut for sleeping around while my boyfriend sits at home? Probably! But we’re fighting an intergalactic war, none of this makes any sense and…”  
  
“No, no!”, Matt interrupts him with an apologetic smile, raising his hands in a calming gesture. “I just wanted to make sure I got this right, I don’t think you’re a slut at all! No, on the contrary, I think your relationship sounds really interesting, you trust each other _so much_ , it’s incredible.”  
Taken aback by Matt’s sudden praise Lance falls silent, his jaw working around nothing before he finds his voice again.  
“You don’t … think it’s weird.”  
Matt shakes his head with a patient smile. God, Shiro wants to kiss him, both of them. Maybe, hopefully, later.  
  
“Not at all. The fact alone that you were confident enough in your relationship to talk about what you really want and need … I admire that, honestly.”  
Lance lets out a deep, deep breath as his shoulders relax and the cheery mask crumbles to make way for real relief and a thin smile.  
“I see why he likes you so much”, he breathes and scoots closer again, searching contact which Matt willingly provides as he throws his legs over Lance’s lap with a surprisingly casual movement.  
“Right back at you”, he grins and Lance flushes, his happy smile widening.  
  
They’re adorable together, so pretty and at ease now that Matt warmed up a bit and Lance let go of the fake exuberance, stopped trying to overcompensate … with a slight pang of surprise Shiro notes that he wouldn’t mind watching them kiss either. But that was a much bigger Maybe, something they should take more time with so they could really get to know each other. But there was also no need to rule it out completely.  
  
“So…”, Matt begins after a relaxed pause, looking at Lance, then Shiro. “What now?”

That is the point Shiro decides to get back into the conversation.  
“Well, our usual rules wouldn’t apply to you”, he says, shifting on the edge of the bed until he has a better view of them starting to pile together like a pair of puppies, with Matt scooting backwards so he can lean against the wall and Lance following him easily, keeping long legs in his lap and starting to fiddle mindlessly with the seam of Matt’s pants.  
“Because you’re special”, Lance adds with a grin and Shiro can hear the fondness in his voice, the carefully balanced curiosity. “You two mean too much to each other.”  
  
The ease in the words, the endless understanding hiding beneath, makes Shiro fall in love with Lance all over again. So much that his chest pulls tight and breathing becomes harder. He has to clear his throat before speaking.  
“Right. You see I told Lance about us. About our … history. And when I finished he, well…”  
“I basically told him he’d be an idiot to let you leave again. Our lives are so crazy and we don’t get a lot of second chances. So if there’s a shot at happiness we need to take it, right?”  
  
Matt’s eyes, bright and wide and beautiful, flick over to Shiro.  
“He taught me that”, Shiro admits. The truth is he learned a lot from their blue paladin, who’d given him so much more than expected. How to allow himself happiness was only one of those many things.  
He hopes Matt can see how good Lance is for him, how good he could be for both of them with time. Hopes Matt can see the chance that’s opening up right in front of them where they’d never expected anything to be ever again.  
Hopes Matt will learn to allow himself to be happy, just the way Shiro did.  
  
After a moment Matt blinks, his brow creasing just lightly when he looks away from Shiro, like he has to force himself.  
“I’m still not sure I get what you’re talking about”, he admits with a weak chuckle, pointedly not looking at either of them until Lance nudges his side playfully, making him shiver.  
“We’re asking if you wanna join us! I guess we’d both be dating Shiro, not necessarily each other but … stuff happens sometimes so who knows?”  
With that Lance reaches out to twirl a lock of Matt’s hair around his finger, brushing the young man’s neck in the process and wringing a strained little sigh from him.  
  
Lance licks his lips.  
“God, you’re touch starved”, he breathes, sounding so focused and drawn in by the unusual reactions that Shiro can’t do anything but feel fascinated as well. Being as physically affectionate as Lance is he knows how people usually tend to react to his liberal but not uncontrolled attentions. Knows when someone wants him to back off or come closer or, very rarely, is so overwhelmed by the lightest brush of skin against skin that they don’t even know what to do with themselves, let alone the offered intimacy.  
  
Shiro bites his lower lip, holds his breath without even noticing as Lance repeats the movement, slides his knuckles along Matt’s neck with purpose this time, slow and gentle. Matt bites back a tiny moan that makes both of them sigh.  
“How long have you been on that outpost?”, Lance wonders, eyes wide as he cards his fingers through long hair.  
“I don’t know … months? Longer?”, Matt shrugs, trying to sound nonchalant but leaning into Lance’s hand, straining for more.  
  
Unable to old back any longer Shiro reaches out as well and cups Matt’s strong, calloused fingers with his own. The touch wrings a low, surprised noise from Matt.  
“It would mean so much to me if you gave this a chance”, Shiro breathes, sliding closer, pulled in by both of them. “I know it’s not what you dreamed of back when but … just because I have feelings for Lance now doesn’t mean I can’t have the same feelings for you still.”  
Matt swallows visibly and his eyes are so wide, so gorgeous, Shiro gets lost in them for a long time. Then Matt licks his lips, nods slowly as his eyes wander between them.  
  
“Let’s try”, he finally mumbles and Lance lets out a happy giggle, surging forward to wrap strong arms around Matt’s body.  
“Oh god, yes!”, he grins, nuzzling into Matt’s shoulder who’s frozen in shock for a few moments before slowly loosening up again. “I swear you won’t regret this, Shiro is the best boyfriend ever! So sweet and understanding, the best cuddler and boy…” Shiro know what Lance is going to say next, wants to stop him but his boyfriend is already leaning into Matt’s ear to whisper: “He’s so damn good in bed, ugh, you’ll have to try yourself…”  
  
“Uhm…”, Matt mouths back, suddenly flushed to the very tips of his ears and awkwardly avoiding eye contact with Shiro. It’s kind of cute, seeing him like that. Still he’d prefer Lance didn’t risk scaring him away after all.  
“I uh, you said something … something about rules. Earlier…?”, Matt stutters, helplessly trying to change the topic but Lance quickly shakes his head before snuggling up again.  
“Later”, he hums and Shiro couldn’t agree more.  
  
“Yes, rules and details can wait”, he smiles as he sidles up close as well, easily wrapping an arm around Matt’s shoulders and pulling him close.  
Trembling between them Matt’s breathing gets deeper, heavier, and then he turns to hide his face against Shiro’s chest with a weak nod.  
“Okay.” It sounds just a little strained but they decide to ignore that fact as they settle in, Shiro slowly raising a hand to stroke a suspiciously damp cheek with his thumb, Lance rubbing Matt’s back as best as he could through the layers of stiff clothes.  
For now they’d concentrate on giving Matt the contact and sweet touches he so obviously craved. Anything else would come after that.


	2. Chapter 2

Matt breathed a small, helpless sound as he melted back into Shiro who was holding him safe and warm and steady, just like he always did.  
“Look at him”, Shiro rumbled, close enough to send hot shivers down Matt’s spine. “Isn’t he the prettiest boy you’ve ever seen?”  
It took all of his willpower to open his eyes but when he finally managed Matt thanked his lucky stars that he did.  
  
Lance was always handsome, with his easy, flirty confidence and effortless charm. But now, on his knees, with those clever lips wrapped around Matt’s cock, big blue eyes looking up at him like sucking dick was his greatest pleasure in life, was what he’d been built for … he was gorgeous.   
This wasn’t the first time Matt got to enjoy the red paladin’s mouth but he still hadn’t gotten used to the sheer enthusiasm and determination Lance showed when he got to work on a cock. Sometimes he seriously doubted he ever could.  
  
“Two possibilities”, Shiro continued and it was so hard to focus on the steady voice when Lance was slurping up his length, so messy and unashamed.   
“He can keep going and swallow your come…” A breathy noise escaped him at the suggestion. That sounded so very tempting…  
“Or…” The smooth voice dipped even lower into a hot purr, Shiro’s large hand liding down his chest to come lie on his lower abdomen, so warm and grounding.  
“You can fuck him.”  
  
Matt let out an embarrassing squeak, unsure if prompted by the words or the way Lance’s tongue danced across his sensitive tip that very second. Probably a combination of both.  
Big blue eyes blinked slowly up at him, watching, waiting, patient and silent, while Matt’s brain desperately tried to compute. It was made for codes and algorithms, not for sudden offers like this.  
“F-fuck…”, he stuttered, clumsy fingers winding through Lance’s hair, making the boy sigh and Shiro hum in his back.  
  
“We’ve been thinking about it for a while. You two are … getting along so well…” There was a dirty, amused tone to the voice and Matt grinned despite himself. “Might as well take it a bit further.”  
Lance gave a pointed suck at that, swallowing Matt deep, deeper, until his nose brushed curly hair and plump lips were wrapped firmly around the base, throat so tight around the length and big blue eyes still blinking up at him like that.  
Matt almost, almost came but he wasn’t sure if that was really the option he wanted to pick. So he dug the nails of one hand into Shiro’s thigh, grabbing soft hair with the other, and held back.  
  
“Take your time”, Shiro smiled, trailed hot lips along his neck, always so considerate.  
Another second or two and Lance pulled off with a delicious slide and a positively filthy noise. When he spoke his voice was raspy and deep and one of the hottest things Matt had ever heard, aside from Shiro talking dirty while buried balls-deep inside him or begging for release, of course.  
“If you don’t want it now or wanna think about it that’s fine. ‘s not a one time deal or anything, no take it or leave it.”  
  
A few moments passed, moments of Lance blinking up at him, of Shiro’s supportive warmth. Then Matt curled his fingers around the back of Lance’s head and nudges him, leaning down to meet him halfway in a hungry and messy kiss. He could taste himself on Lance’s playful tongue and when he pulled back the boy was grinning victoriously at him.   
“I can’t believe you two talked about this behind my back”, he snickered even though the truth was that he could.  
  
Of course he could imagine them hands wandering or limbs tangled or curled up in post-coital bliss, chatting about him and the three of them and how they wanted things to go from here.  
If they wanted to keep things as they were, with both Lance and Matt on Shiro’s side, only exchanging the occasional, cheeky blowjob for their mutual boyfriend’s viewing pleasure or if they wanted it to become something more.  
  
It wasn’t like Matt hadn’t thought about it either. He loved Shiro, god did he love the man, enough that he didn’t even mind sharing him with Lance – even though it was more of Lance sharing him with Matt. It didn’t matter as long as Shiro was in love with both of them and if he liked watching them fool around sometimes, well …   
Lance wasn’t exactly hard on the eyes, far from it, and surprisingly good with his mouth as well.   
Matt couldn’t say he wasn’t curious about what other things the boy might be talented at.   
  
“It was his idea”, Shiro rumbled and yeah, that made sense. Shiro wouldn’t ever push them to do anything. It had taken them long enough to admit that the thought of them together excited him, let alone suggest to actually try it. As far as he was concerned he could probably die happy now.   
Lance on the other hand was far more curious and open to all kinds of experimentation. It had probably only been a matter of time until he wanted to try something new.  
  
With a crooked smirk Matt leaned down into another kiss, this time slower and more controlled as he tried to reign in Lance’s abundant enthusiasm.   
“Well then”, Matt grinned, the excited spark in pretty blue eyes making his heartbeat stutter. “Get me some lube.”

**Author's Note:**

> Check out my [tumblr](https://fenfyre.tumblr.com/) or my [pillowfort](https://www.pillowfort.io/fenfyre)


End file.
